Tear Drops and Hope

Dear Readers, 

Do you remember the children's book "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day"?

That was my day, both yesterday and today. Yesterday I woke up and I just felt unattractive. I had dark circles under my eyes, a pimple on my forehead, I was running late that morning, and did not have a nice outfit on, and got to work 30 minutes late... yikes. 

Once I got to work I started to get in the groove of doing what my boss wanted me to. I was answering his emails and helping with clients. Through out the day though I had a coworker, who let's just say, wanted to bicker, and since I wasn't giving in hurt the feelings of said person. 

After handling that fiasco, I got assigned to help one client in particular, for my boss. It's a long story and I can not go into details but she was not following the rules and was not happy that she got caught by the head of the company. 

With that being said... the person decided to talk down to me, belittle me, and try her best to make me feel insignificant. After the hour long meeting, I walked away feeling defeated and even less self-esteem than before, when I left my home this morning. I had to take a minute to myself and have a little cry and also just to get some actual fresh air. It helped and I freshened myself up and went back in and continued to my work. 

Later that evening I discovered the news that my friends brother, who has been missing since July 27th, 2017 body was discovered.
After feeling sorry for myself all day I couldn't help but feel horrible. Here I am, feeling I look ugly and bad because I have been having a horrible work day and my friend and his entire's families heart's were just shattered. They lost a brother, son, father, and husband. An amazing man and will never be forgotten.

After hearing this, I waited till everyone else left my work building and I just sat at my desk and with my hands on my knees and head laying in them, I cried and cried some more. For awhile I just could not get them to stop. I felt defeated and my heart felt quite heavy...

I drove home listening to some songs, to help cheer me up. Once I got home I did some self-care. That included:
1)Steam Shower
2) Watching "The Goonies"
3) Eating some lemon cake with cream cheese frosting
4) Hugs from my family

After doing that I felt much more calm and like I could go to sleep that night.


Even though these past 2 days have been hard, I have grown and I have learned something.
It's okay to have moments where you feel bad for yourself but do not stew in them. If you have to have a couple days to hurt, do it and do not let anyone say you can't.
We each NEED to feel all of our emotions and not let them get pushed down and ignore them. It's unhealthy and does so much damaged to our mental and physical health in the long run.

Remember to do a thing a day for you and for someone else. It really will make you feel better and get you through the trying times. It has for me.

SO! Even though my life is a little bit of a roller coaster, at the moment. I know it will get less bumpy and smooth, soon.



 Life is a blessing and so are each of you.

Love,

Nathan